Have you ever wondered why your man does the things he does?
Randy Bennett explains in his latest article below exactly why men do
some of the strange things that they do.
But more importantly, he details how you can use this knowledge to get your man to treat you better - and wake him up to the amazing woman he has right in front of him - YOU!
Randy's a licensed relationship expert, with 25 years of experience counseling successful couples - so I think he probably knows what he's talking about. Did you ever wonder why men do some of the CRAZY things they do? Did you ever feel completely puzzled by your man's behavior? If it seems like sometimes his behavior is completely weird or irrational, don't feel bad... because you're exactly right. You see, science teaches us that while some of our desires and drives are conscious, many of them are not. This is ESPECIALLY true for men. While most men would NEVER admit this (most don't even know it), some of their behaviors, drives, and desires are biologically driven.
Why Sometimes Men Don't Have a Choice...In other words, in some areas, men don't have a choice. They are simply "wired" a certain way.
This is why he can seem considerate and thoughtful one moment, and callous and cold a few seconds later. This is why sometimes you're caught off-guard by his unexpected harsh words, or cold behavior. It's why you're sometimes left feeling as if he "pulled the rug out from under you".
But don't worry. None of this is an excuse to let him get away with stupid behavior. In fact, it's a key to getting what you want from your man.
To Get What You Want from Your Man, Understand This...Change starts when we recognize the simple biological differences between men
and women. For instance....Women generally want connection and family: they define themselves by their relationships.
They have the nurturing instinct, the need to take care of others and maintain the health and wellness of the people they care for.Men, however, generally identify themselves by what they do: they want to be providers. A man has a need to take care of the family and be the breadwinner. It is a
subconscious need -- most men are not even aware that they have this need or drive. While men have many of these subconscious drives, there are at least five basic needs that all men have deep within themselves; if any of these needs are not being met, it will cause problems in your relationship.
The 5 Basic Needs that ALL Men Have...
What are these needs? They are:
1. Words of affirmation and praise.
2. A sense of being respected.
3. The feeling that he is being listened to and heard.
4. Physical touch. (This doesn't necessarily mean sex, but rather affection.)
5. Intimacy and bonding (yes, believe it or not!)
All you have to do is meet these five basic needs, and meet them consistently, to see your relationship transformed right before your eyes.
Meeting these needs gives you a great deal of influence with your man -- he'll be willing to do almost ANYTHING you ask, at the drop of a hat, because you have suddenly become the source of most of the good feelings he's having about his life. He may not even realize what's happening.
The best part is, this is "ethical influence" because you're meeting his most basic psychological needs. Not wants, but needs. It's as if you are nourishing his soul. And what do YOU get out of the deal? The man you want -- the man who adores you, shows true affection towards you, and puts you ahead of everything else in his life.
For more information on learning how to “Melt Your Man's Heart and understanding what gets men all excited about their women, use this link to understand how to build a deep emotional connection with your man.
Try it today, and see for yourself.
I wish you the best,
Randall E. Bennett, MA, LMFT, LCPC
P.S. A man's brain and behavior can be tough to predict, but I've identified a set of secret triggers, that when accessed, will wake him up so he's more interested in what YOU are saying than in the darn remote control.